Why Does Our Net Worth Impact Our Self Worth?

5 min readJan 11, 2022

The pandemic put an economic strain on many ultra-high-net-worth individuals. With another uncertain year ahead, what tools can we use to safeguard our health from financial insecurity?

Financial security enables you to survive, thrive and exist comfortably in the modern world. It is such a key part of life that for many their self worth has become inseparable from their net worth. That means when they experience economic loss, it can trigger a sense of failure or shame.

It’s not uncommon for these feelings to go further and turn into a fear of rejection from your peers. For a species evolved to live in communities, those feelings can be very difficult to process. Your subconscious responds as if it is facing a genuine threat, which if prolonged will take its toll on your mental health.

With that in mind, and since your financial situation is likely to have its ups and downs, it is worth developing tools that protect your health from changes in your wealth.

Can Money Buy Happiness?

The keys to happiness are meaningful relationships and a balanced lifestyle. Money can absolutely help you achieve those ends. But when wealth becomes the end in and of itself (often alongside power), it tends to bring mental health issues with it.

For example, we know that growing up in poverty increases your chances of developing an addiction or mental health issue. On the other hand, studies show that children who grow up on easy street are more likely to develop depression, anxiety and addiction than their peers. In both cases, children growing up at either end of the wealth spectrum are more likely to experience neglect, which can foster a deep-seated sense of loneliness.

Research also shows that people who attach their self-worth to external forces like their finances have worse relationships and greater feelings of loneliness and social disconnection.

**What Exactly is Self-Worth?**

In an ideal world, your self-worth is an internal voice telling you that you are a valuable human being, worthy of love, without any reference to external forces. But it isn’t easy cultivating this kind of healthy self-esteem particularly if you have had a challenging childhood. For many it is a lifelong journey.

Without that foundational belief in your value, your identity has no solid base. That can leave you striving to build it in adulthood and looking for solutions in the wrong places: if you could just get that big break, win over that client, get that promotion, start the perfect relationship… then your struggles would be over. You have shown the world you are, in fact, worthy of love.

But, as many ultra-successful person could tell you, it doesn’t work like that.

If your sense of belonging is built on external attributes, it can be taken away from you at any point. Because it doesn’t come from within, your self-esteem is both more fragile and isolating. As a result, you need to keep finding more and more external markers of success to strengthen it. But it is a delicate strength. For example, if you learn that someone in your peer-group is more successful than you, it is likely to trigger the fear of rejection mentioned above.

Psychological self-worth theory argues that our main priority in life is to find self-acceptance. We usually try to find that self-acceptance through our achievements because we have been encouraged to do that since our childhood. But most of us do not develop the tools to find it within ourselves, which is why, in a world where net-worth is the most widely used measure of success, it can quickly become indistinguishable from your self-worth. But there are ways to break this unhealthy connection.

How to Build Self-Esteem from the Inside Out:

1. Step Off the Hedonic Treadmill

The hedonic treadmill refers to the human tendency to adapt to our situation whether it is good or bad. For example, you might experience periods of increased happiness due to a new relationship or financial success, but it is short lived. Eventually, your brain adapts to this new normal and you become restless for the next rung on the ladder.

Accepting that these feelings are inevitable and practising gratitude can help you get off the treadmill and look inwards for self worth.

2. Do the Work

If you want to stop your self-worth being so dependent on your successes, you need to work out who you are without them and what you want from life. Take a moment to ask yourself these questions:

· What am I grateful for?
· What about myself do I like?
· What aspects of my life do I wish I could change?
· What am I afraid of?
· What experiences have taught me the most? Why?
· What are my favourite memories? Who is in them with me?
· Who am I inspired by?
· When I was a child, what did I do for fun?
· What do I believe in?
· What is unique about me?

3. Forgive yourself

When we struggle with low self-esteem or self-worth, we are often extra-critical of ourselves. As a result, whenever we feel any of the normal negative emotions (anger, sadness, disappointment and so on) we can feel worse about ourselves, as that inner critic punishes us for failing to be perfect.

Instead, try to focus on fostering self-acceptance and forgiveness. No one is perfect, and we all have our limitations, including you.

Paracelsus Recovery

At Paracelsus Recovery, our treatment is grounded in our core principles of empathy, pragmatism and care. We design comprehensive treatment programmes tailored to each client’s unique needs.

We work exclusively with UHNW individuals whose mental health challenges often go unnoticed due to the misconception that financial security ensures mental stability. We only treat one client at any given time and provide the strictest confidentiality. To assist your recovery, our international team of highly qualified professionals will work with you around the clock, seven days a week.

We recognise that the pandemic has been a difficult time for many UHNW individuals. Our treatment centres are open and ready to support you. Alternatively, we can send our team to you and/or provide a fully-virtual treatment programme.

To know more, please follow us on Twitter or contact us directly to info@paracelsus-recovery.com